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imageWhat do you do when you fall in love with someone so deeply you know in your heart you will never get over this person? You’ve read countless articles, blogs, How to’s but nothing seems to work. In your heart, you’ve found your match. No one will ever make you feel like this again, And you don’t want anyone else. So, now what? Are you destined to roam this earth alone? Should you go convince your ex that they are making a huge mistake and  you must be together? What do you do when you have to get over someone you know you will love forever?

First of all, accept the fact you will love them forever, and learn to be okay with that. So many people waste so much energy trying to hate someone who no longer love them back, only to come to an exhausting realization they still love them. Why waste the energy? Yes, maybe they were a jerk, and totally do not deserve your love, but truth is, they have it anyway.

Secondly, believe you can be happy and miserable at the same time. Confused? One of the most fascinating things I discovered from my heartbreak is the complexity of human emotion. I always assumed if the love of my life dumped me I would spend every second of my day miserable. I linked my happiness to him, and without him, I assumed it would equal eternal misery. Which it was, until little by little I noticed there are things that made me happy. Life does go on. A small smile here, a little laugh there, and before I knew it, I was actually happy for a brief moment. This all happened at the same time I was grieving the loss of my “soul mate”. There is always an emptiness in my chest, and a pain I cannot explain, and yet there is also other things in the world that can make me smile. Even if it feels like you will never be happy without this person, I promise you, it is possible. I feel happiness when I play piano. I smile when my brothers baby laughs. I look at the stars at night, and think, how beautiful. There are still so many gifts in the world Waiting for you. Loving someone and happiness are two separate things. Happiness is often mistaken as something someone brings you, but it is actually something within you.

Thirdly, the heart is capable of so much love. Although your previous love can never be duplicated, you can find a different love that you never even knew. The heart is not predictable. Remember back to who you were before you met and fell in love with your ex? Could you have ever imagined the feelings you would feel? Everything about love strikes you like lightning. Realize the thoughts sent from your brain are not always correct. Sometimes you just have to believe in the unknown.

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