Okay. So probably no one will believe this post today. I mean, heck, I wouldn’t believe it if it didn’t happen to me. I would probably think it was some desperate blogger trying to rack up views, and create an “interesting” story.
So believe it or not, I’m going to write about it. Largely, because I have a terrible memory and writing it down will help me retain, and process what just happened to me.So weird.
Today, I went shopping to the mall, while my mom went to get her hair done. I bought a couple necklaces at the zara sale, and then my mom picked me up. Anyways, we then went to another store where, I then decided to return to the mall to return one of my necklaces. On the way out, I got an urge to get a coffee, and then this rather pretty, young women, started to speak to me about “a guy” “and he really does love you” “call me”. First, I was, SUPER weirded out. I was like, Excuse me? Do I know you? She then proceeded to say, “I need to give you a reading, there is a guy and he loves you very much but someone in his family is jealous of him and wants to break you guys up” after she said this all bets were off, my mouth dropped to the floor, and I was like, what?! OMG. She then was like, let me give you a reading, and I told her ” I’m sorry, I really have NO money. Which I didn’t because my mom literally just dropped me off to return the Zara necklace. Anyways, she told me its fine, I really need to speak to you and its important, so she directed me to two chairs at the far side of the coffee place. She then started to speak about my ex and how he is my twin flame. I literally gasped when she said this because I had already assumed this 2 years ago when our relationship was a volatile combination of heaven and hell, but I just never spoke about it to anyone besides my ex, and this very “private” blog. After she said twin flames, I was intrigued how much more she could read me, so I just continued to listen. She told me I have a very dark energy over my head and it is coming from the pain in my heart and that I had given up on happiness all together. Which is true. She also knew about my problems sleeping, but of course that could also be pretty obvious with the bags under my eyes. She then proceeded to talk to me about the fact that there were people who are jealous of our relationship, and are a driving wedge in our relationship. Which struck a chord with me, because his younger brother use to have a crush on me and told a very big lie to my ex about how i wanted to kiss him, and he could have had me if he had wanted to. Which is the BIGGEST lie in the world! Nevertheless, it caused a huge trust issue on his part about my feelings for him. She then told me, both of us are not the people we “should” be because of the “negative place” our relationship has become. She even knew my ex’s career had declined since our break and started to tell me he has started to self destruct. In fact she even knew he is living without a soul, and has been very misguided for awhile,a “lost soul”. Which was AMAZING, because I had written on this blog many times, that he is spiritually very lost and constantly doubts the existence of a soul. She then told me, I on the other hand am very spiritual, but she fears I have given up on happiness in it’s entirety. This was true, and was really a hard moment for me, and I nearly cried. She told me, I can tell you are now comfortable with “pain” and you do not eve desire “happiness” but she said to me I must want it again. She said, this heavy cloud over me, is pushing away positive energies, and attracting negative one’s. She said I must be with my ex, and he is very faithful to me and loyal. Which was a BIG thing to hear because I always struggled with my suspicions while we were together. She said we need each other, and pushing each other away is negative for our lives. However, she said my “dark cloud of pain” will prevent us from being together, and will be the cause of our break, every single time. So of course, I am thinking, “Tell Me What To Do?”
She then started by saying she needs to give me a full reading where she will find the cause of this “darkness” whether it from a past life, or from something that happened to me, then she said she would need a handwritten sample, and a picture of my ex, and this all had to be done by tomorrow, for a one time, discounted, great deal, low price of just $80! lol. Ok. So finally got the hook, and she obviously was trying to reel me in as a new client. Don’t get me wrong, she is AMAZING! I am one of the biggest skeptics in the world and she read me like some mystical magician! I believe she has super powers, and I was “meant” to hear the words she spoke to me today. Everything was too powerful and meaningful to me to be left as a simple, scam or trick. 99% of me was and is dying to have her just HELP ME make all my problems go away. However the other 1% is a very powerful percentage that debates the importance of not becoming dependent on a healer, or a psychic, and living your life as you are “told” will bring happiness, or the “correct” outcome. For me, my importance lies in the decisions I make from my own will, strength, and soul. They may bring me unhappiness, failure and pain, but it at least will not cheat me, “the process of “trying” and “living” my life without an answer key.
Don’t get me wrong, I am beyond appreciative of all the things she has told me today, and I will cherish our conversation as some mystical, surreal, encounter, that I will never fully understand, explain, or forget.
However, I do believe there comes a point in every situation when you, must shut that pandora’s box, and walkaway. Of course the temptation is huge to sneak a peak at the end of the book, and see how things will end. However, the meaning of my life is to “live”, and making my own mistakes is part of that journey. Success, and happiness, is not my belief as the purpose of one’s life. Just as a good book is not determined by the level of how successful or happy the character ends up, a good life is also not based on the positive life, but the complexity and growth of the character itself.
wow. this post took a heavy turn into a direction i didn’t predict. sorry about the disappearance of capital letters where they belong, and probably several grammatical errors. it’s very late or i guess very early in the morning and i am delusional. i literally can’t even remember what i just wrote. take care friend. gnite.