Can I first start by saying, does anyone know why this one drug has so many names? Cannabis, pot, marijuana, THC, weed, and the list goes on. Anyways, I wrote about “weed” over a year ago, right around when my ex-flame and I split up. It was actually the topic of our last fight and the final snap to our entire relationship.
Lately, the topic of cannabis is popping up all around me, and I have realized my mind is working very differently than it did a year ago. A year ago, after I moved away, I noticed my then boy friend, spiral into depression and increasing use of pot. By the final days of our relationship, he was going over to his friend’s house every night to smoke, and drink. It scared me to see him loose the fire in his eyes, and I immediately feared the health risks it may cause him. The last email I wrote him besides my after break-up “goodbye”, was a 6 page informational email all about Cannabis. Being the complete nerd that I am, it contained diagrams, pie charts, and graphs. After this email we skyped the next day, and of course, again, he was partying the night before, hungover, and obviously completely not interested anything I wrote. Leading to a huge blowout fight, that became our final fight and official break up. Of course there were millions of other issues in our relationship but this happened to be the last issue we dealt with.
Now jump over a year later, looking back on my reaction, I see how silly my reaction was. My intentions were obviously good, but as far as making any change, gigantic fail. The truth is, as many articles as I collect stating the health risks attached to drug use, there are just as many articles written stating there are no real health risks. Now a days, there is so much information on the web, it’s hard to depend on “facts” as truly facts unless you are the one who is literally making the tests and looking through the microscope.
So what to do then? Lets first realize drug use is a philosophical issue, rather than a “health” issue. This is the biggest realization I have made. I was so focused on the “physical” impact rather than the social and mental reasoning of drug use. After all, unless you are retarded or lived under a rock all your life, you do realize “drugs” are not healthy and a “BAD” thing to do. Debating how dangerous something is or is not, and studying the science behind it, is only interesting to people who would never do drugs in the first place. The topic of discussion should be, “How do you want to live you life?”
All the issues dealing with drug use have to do with philosophical issues. State of mind, meaning of life, secrets, identity, etc. People do drugs, to escape, but we spend so much time telling them how unhealthy it is, when none of that really matters to a user. Of course basic knowledge at High Schools are a must, and kids who do it to fit in, are not the same as adults who do it.
Drug use is like “cheating”. You cheat life, when you skip steps or use substances to “feel” something. Everything you are experiencing does not belong to you, but to the drug. The drug is center stage, the lead role in your life. You are the life of the party or you think you are but truth is, the “Drug” is the life of the party, you are simply a empty shell. It is like watching a movie, and experiencing a situation, rather than actually “LIVING” in your Movie. You become a spectator, undeniably amused, but lacking in your own motivation. In the beginning the illusion is strong, but constantly fading, devouring you. You think you are relaxed, but the state of denial, or escapism, is never peaceful. Constantly regretting, avoiding, and feeling guilty, needing more ways to cover the noise in your head. Masking your issues, over and over again, like a hoarder, it’s only time. Time will unfortunately reveal all truths, and then what?