Ever since I was born, I was taught that Happiness was everything. All life decisions should based toward this emotion and anything that caused you pain was somehow a sign that it was the wrong direction. However, my heart break has caused me to have a revelation about this, and it has changed my mind set so completely I decided to write about it.
I believe Happiness should be appreciated, but not desired as the meaning of your life. After all what is happiness to you? Is it satisfaction of achievement, contentment, getting what you want, gratification with what you have? These are all very positive emotions, and extremely desirable human qualities, but lets think a little deeper. When you are 100% happy do you really progress, or advance yourself or situation? Whenever you challenge yourself it is coming from a place of desire, and need for something you do not have. That desire stems from some amount of underlying pain. There is always pain within us because, through pain you develop and grow. Desiring only to be happy is the same as a child who only wants to eat ice cream.
The truth is pain is not a bad thing. You learn from mistakes, you grow from disappointment, and pain challenges you to over come steps you never believed you could pass. You can surprise yourself and accomplish things that were not possible. Anyone, who has developed any type of skill to a professional level know about the “pain” involved in reaching that goal. Whether it be social sacrifices, disappointment, hours of practice, rejection, or failure, the path to personal development will always involve pain. Yes, there is also happiness, but if I look back at my music days at conservatory, the pain was more frequent than happiness. Happiness came as splashes, here in there when I recognized beauty in my achievements, or receiving compliments in my progress, but it definitely was out weighed by the pain. This is what makes happiness, desirable, and glamorous. It pushes you, because we want to reach that comfortable feeling of acceptance and satisfaction. It is a safe place, that relaxes you and rewards you for all your hard effort, but, desiring to always to be in a state of “Happiness” is one dimensional and lacking purpose for your life and the direction it takes. Through my pain I have learned so much about life, achieved strength, revealed truths , eternal growth of compassion, empathy, sympathy, and understanding of the importance to continuously evolve and grow. After all if you have never fallen how will you ever know how to get up?